Comin' Along

Today I learned that it is very difficult to keep up this blog. But I also learned that it is extremely, extremely important.

And also:

1. I care too much what other people think. But at the same time, I'm sick of people telling me to stop caring what other people think because, you know what? I'm not going to. And neither are they. Everyone cares what other people think of them. That's how we have a society. That's how we live in communities. Caring too much is bad, but it's bad advice to say, "stop caring." That's just going to the other extreme. It's important to care. Just not too much.

2. I've been discovering this over a longish period of time, but I have a lot of respect for each of my friends. I know this is an odd thing to "learn." But I found that I am able to respect very mundane qualities that I see as important. Some people respect those with amazing qualities who have overcome difficult obstacles, who have acted heroically, who have grown in major ways...

No. I respect that, of course. But I have a lot of respect for the simpler qualities, too. And I think that helps me see the goodness in people a lot easier.

3. I learned this one from a very random place, but the happier, more confident, more easy-going you are, the easier it will be to have that charisma necessary to easily make friends. And the more people will like you from the get-go without having to break through any walls first.

It's been a difficult few days. There have been times where I just wanted to sign out of gchat for forever and retreat away from everyone and everything for a while. Drastic, I know. But hopefully I'm reaching the end of that. Keeping this blog is forcing me to find the positive in each day, which is really helpful. I've been overly sensitive to everything this week and part of me just wants to curl up and have ice cream and some TLC or something for a while. Or at least a good laugh. But I guess part of maturing is also knowing that those things don't always come after a difficult time. Sometimes you just have to be strong enough to get over it without anyone to soften things up for you.

...I guess. It's hard to say that stuff. But it's true. But that doesn't make it any less hard. I'm not the toughest girl out there.